She did, however, point out that a 'wonderful, kind man'† who makes a move on you when you are upset and suffering from low self-esteem is, looked at from an outsider's perspective, taking advantage of the vulnerable and confused.
I was pleased Usha said that - in part because I've been shouting it at the radio myself. However I did rather feel that if she wanted to be of real use, instead of bleating "you've got the perfect marriage" which from an outsider's perspective says nothing (and probably gets said to lots of women who objectively have unpleasant marriages to vicious men) she ought to have focussed on the practical. "You mean, you'd leave the farm? And Ambridge? And your children? And what is actually so bad you want to leave for?" I can't imagine anything more likely to get Ruth's back up than saving her marriage becoming a local project. But then I'm rubbish at the sympathy and prefer the practical myself, so I expect I'm biased.
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regna
(no subject)
Date: 2006-11-02 09:27 am (UTC)I was pleased Usha said that - in part because I've been shouting it at the radio myself. However I did rather feel that if she wanted to be of real use, instead of bleating "you've got the perfect marriage" which from an outsider's perspective says nothing (and probably gets said to lots of women who objectively have unpleasant marriages to vicious men) she ought to have focussed on the practical. "You mean, you'd leave the farm? And Ambridge? And your children? And what is actually so bad you want to leave for?" I can't imagine anything more likely to get Ruth's back up than saving her marriage becoming a local project. But then I'm rubbish at the sympathy and prefer the practical myself, so I expect I'm biased.